Wednesday, April 13, 2005


Proof That There Is A God

Newt Gingrich actually thinks he can successfully run for President. Oh, please. This would make Tom DeLay's and Jeb Bush's ham-handedness in the Schiavo case look positively adroit. The Republican bench must be pretty damned shallow (and it is) if Newt thinks he can make a comeback. During the primaries, we'd sit back and not say a word. Nada. Then, when he wins the primaries, let 'er rip. Here's an ad with three voiceovers that I'd love to see running in October of 2008: First voice (Screen caption: "Jackie", with pics of her and the young Newt) : "I was in the hospital, I'd just had cancer surgery. I was fighting just to get the strength to lift up my head. He came into the room with divorce papers and wouldn't leave until I'd signed them. The divorce settlement left me and our children so poor that our church took up collections for us." Second voice, somewhat younger (Screen caption: "Marianne", with pics of her and Newt): "I was at my mother's house for Mother's Day. My doctors said a few months before that I probably had MS, and they later confirmed that I did. He called me at my mother's house and told me he wanted a divorce." A third voice, this time male, saying these words as they do a screen crawl with a translucent and slowly growing pic of Newt's face superimposed: "The important thing you have to understand about Newt Gingrich is that he is amoral... There isn't any right or wrong, there isn't any conservative or liberal. There's only what will work best for Newt Gingrich. He's probably one of the most dangerous people for the future of this country that you can possibly imagine. He's Richard Nixon, glib. It doesn't matter how much good I do the rest of my life, I can't ever outweigh the evil that I've caused by helping him be elected to Congress." --L.H. Carter, former political adviser Kiss the women's vote goodbye, Newt.

That ad has to include the juicy detail that all the while the Newtster was expressing moral indignation over Bill Clinton's adultery, he was having his own adulterous affair, complete with trysts in his Congressional office. It's not just the immorality, it's the hypocrisy.
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