Wednesday, December 14, 2005


Will Karl Rove "Come To Jesus"?

It's looking more likely with each hour. (Note the quotation marks. They're there for a reason which will soon become clear.) Here's the deal: Earlier this week, The Raw Story announced that a Bush White House staffer named John Hannah had been flipped by Santa Fitz and was now putting Karl Rove in extreme legal jeopardy. This morning, various other traditional media organs (like The National Review and Bob Novak) are chiming in, and The Raw Story has another piece on this as well. Synopsis: Fitz hauls out the electron microscope, gets a fix on Rove's genitals, and puts them in the vise. Now, Rove has a rep of being the Chuck Colson of the Bush II Administration. The tough guy. The enforcer. The guy for whom revenge is meat and drink. The guy who his boss thinks will gladly sacrifice himself for the boss. But, when Colson faced his own genitalia-in-a-vise crisis, he did NOT "sacrifice himself for the boss". Oh, no. He had a very conveniently timed "religious conversion" that required him to spill his guts, and thus set the machinery in motion that took down his boss, Dick Nixon. Hmmmm.... if we start seeing pictures of Karl cuddling up to, say, Billy Graham (he wouldn't dare do it with Dobson, because Mullah Dobson would backstab him in a heartbeat by running to Bush and Cheney with the news), we know what's going to come next. Pass the popcorn! UPDATE: Looks like Rove's being beaten to the punch in the Let's Sell Out Bush race. Digby mentions Bob "Prince of Darkness" Novak's pointing the finger at Bush in what I can only interpret as an apparent effort to get somebody off his back. Novakula's showing his willingness to toss Bush over the side to save himself. The thing is, why should Novak still need to save himself? Novak's presumably been flipped already, which is widely assumed to be the reason why Fitz hasn't thrown him in jail. So why do that little dig at Bush -- unless Novak is back in jeopardy again? Could it be that something he said to Fitz didn't pan out, and/or was contradicted by other testimony or events? And is a conversion to the Church of Colson -- to be immediately followed by a tell-all book -- not far behind?

Will Karl Rove Come to Jesus? Yes he will. Only Jesus could help Rove at this point: the same Jesus who rose up Lazarus from the dead.

You don't, do not, do do do not not not want a prosecutor like Fitz after you. When Fitz is done with a person that person is "done, ruined and fucked." (Quote attributed to someone who knows how Fitz works.)

Fitz is a dangerous extremist. Who said that? Tweety? Bill O'Reilly? Bzzzt. Wrong.

The person who called Fitz a dangerous extremist was one of the terrorists Fitz prosecuted.

Merry Fitzmas.
The Rove-Colson analogy just doesn't work. I cannot -- I'm sorry, I tried, and I just cannot -- see Rove devoting himself to a prison ministry. He just couldn't look the part no matter how much money he could make from it.
Well, Colson's ministry isn't exactly much more than gold-plated window dressing, and I can just see Karl being arrogant enough to think he could pull it off. (Granted, to me he looks like a child-molesting serial killer and not a potential man of God, but hey. Falwell looks even oilier, and he had a successful career.)
To me, every member of Bush's inner circle looks like a Modesty Blaise villain.

And I don't mean that in a nice way.
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